Tuesday, May 14, 2019

Things I've learned

In the past, I have been afraid for very good reasons. Rape, abuse, neglect... Those experiences taught me what danger feels like not just from my side, but from other people as well. How other people feel when they are a threat to me. As I got older, I started to trust that and I did well in life. I don't know how linked those two things are.

The ex forced me to doubt myself all the time or risk being abused by him. Now, I can't leave my home I'm so afraid. I can't trust myself or anyone else. Everything feels like a threat. I'm not doing well. I believe the two are connected.

I don't know how to move forward with this knowledge.


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