Recently, my thoughts have been very morose and that has been effecting my world in very negative ways. I have forgotten that I can pull myself out of this pit, but it is very hard work and I have to want it more than I want to be comfortable. Especially when I have so many people telling me that I shouldn't be fighting the overwhelming weight that seems to pull me down with every step I take. That instead, I should do whatever makes me feel most comfortable.
Because it is comfortable to let the depression take over and rule my life. To just give in to it and lay in bed for days and weeks on end. And it literally hurts to get out of bed and go for a hike or meet up with friends for coffee, to go to work when I'm in screaming pain or to walk the dog after that.
The people at +Cracked.com talk about this in their article 6 Harsh Truths That Will Make You A Better Person. They also talk about why it is so harmful for me to let myself do that and why it is in my best interest to fight that with every fiber of my being no matter what I've heard about just letting myself feel what I'm feeling and be who I am.
It's not that I'm a bad person in any way, or that the things that I'm doing are wrong or bad. It's that they are inhibiting me from having the type of life I want to have. If I want to have the amazing relationship, the beautiful home, the great friends, the wonderful job, I can not get them by doing the same things that got me to the place I am now. I have to do different things. But not just different things, things that are useful to the people and the world around me.
As it turns out, when I thought about it, I do have a number of skills that are of great use to the outside world. I just have never figured out how to really make use of them. For example, I'm one of the most organized people I know, and I have a great feel for people and what they need (even if it isn't always what they want), I could put those things together to become a Life Coach... or, I love working with and learning about social media, I could use that to help businesses in the area get their presence more known on the internet... and that's just the stuff I came up with off the top of my head for jobs!
There is the harsh truth of my life that I do have physical limitations, but I have started to wonder how often I use that as an excuse because I'm scared to push harder to get out of where I am. The only way to know is to try.
So, in a couple of weeks Puppy and I are going with a friend to our first dog sled pull. We have never done such a thing before and I have to admit I'm a bit nervous, but I think it will be interesting to see how Puppy does and more importantly, how I do.
Wish us luck!