Wednesday, November 16, 2011

The Other End

So, I made it. I'll be heading off to bed soon, hopefully to sleep, and today wasn't half as awful as I expected it to be... though that might be because I spent yesterday venting about it, but I'm ok with that. What matters is that I did it. I didn't have to hide in the house or spend the day in fear for my life. I just had a day, just like any other Wednesday.

Ok, so I was stressed and I lost my temper a little more easily than I might normally... but all things considered, that's normal.

The idea of me writing my rape book was brought up again. I have all sorts of ideas about what I would want to say in it, but who would want to read it? Even the people who are a part of my life and care about me don't know how to handle this stuff and have *every single time* run off when I have opened up to them about it. What good could something like that do for the rest of the world?

Maybe I should try to write it just for me. Just knowing what I would have wanted and being able to "talk" about what happen might be good for me... and of course, there is Kaiya. Some part of me feels like I need to write this for her more than for me.

I started today out with the knowledge that today would be a good day, and it was, though not easy. Tomorrow will be too, but it will be easier.

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