Monday, August 31, 2009

Safe

When I was a kid, every time I would get upset, I would lock myself in in closet so that I could cry as long and as hard as I liked and no one could get at me. I would scream at the top of my lungs until my own cries sounded unreal to me. They would echo in my head and block out everything else in the world.

That's safe

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Re-post

A friend posted this on FB and I was so moved by it (I'm shaking as I write this) that I had to pass it on...http://fugitivus.wordpress.com/2009/06/26/another-post-about-rape-3

Saturday, August 1, 2009

Freaking

If I ever had any questions about whether the rape had any effect on me or not, I don't now. Some little kid (MAYBE 10 years old) wandered into the apartment tonight and turned around and ran out when he saw me. Now I'm panicking about having some strange guy wander into the apartment and me being helpless to do anything about it. I haven't slept in days because I've been so worked up about the move, now I have no doubt that I'm not going to sleep because of this.

I'm tired of being scared all of the time...I need this all to stop.