Monday, June 1, 2009


My family has been eaten by pod, really! My last visit with them went well, I didn't leave emotionally scared or feeling like I had to kill myself just to get them out of my head. I left thinking "maybe I CAN have a family...maybe I can belong"

Somehow this scares me more than if I had gone out there and gotten the usual responses to my presence. What do I do with this? Do I trust that it is exactly what it seems to be? Do I treat this the way I have every other interaction with my family?

I'm scared and I REALLY don't know what to do with it. My mother has asked me to go to FL with her and my sister's family in August. I haven't decided for sure what I'm going to do, but right this second I'm emotionally leaning toward going and mentally leaning toward saying no...what do I listen to?

I just don't know.


  1. when do you need to decide by?

    How much control will you have over the trip?

    That is....if you can go...and be in control of when you come back as well as what you do during the vacation, it might be worthwhile to give it a go.

    But if you can't, then I can't think much good would come of it :( :(

  2. I have to have an answer to them by the 5th, I will be able to come and go as I please in FL, but I won't be able to leave FL till everyone does...

    I'm not sure how much good will come of it anyway, but I'm going to give it a go...Goddess be with me.