Sunday, September 21, 2008

Mistake?

Now I've gone and done it. I made a big old mistake (I think) and may have fucked up a friendship because of it. I hope not, and I think this person is centered enough to not let it mess up our friendship, but I don't know yet.

I'm scared and my first reaction to feeling scared is to get angry...but angry at who? My second reaction (since the first one isn't working so well) is to run away...but to where? Running physically away won't get rid of the stuff in my head. I'll still be scared that I screwed up something good.

This person doesn't deserve that. They deserve my love and respect and I'm not sure I have been giving them that in the right ways.

Usually when you know you've done something wrong, you say your sorry...what if you're not sure it was wrong? How do you make amends then? Do you try to make amends?

I'm feeling like a dumb kid all over again.

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