Sunday, August 24, 2008

Love

This little word has been giving me a lot of trouble lately...let me 'splain...nonono, that take too long, let me sum up.

I love lots of people and things in my life. I love my friends, my dog, my bunnies, my car, my lawyer (bet no one ever thought they'd hear that), my partner (when I have one), Mint Newman-O (thanks Yvonne), Sunny day, thunder storms and bonfires on freezing cold nights. But I don't love them the same way.

If someone threw a box of Newman-O off a bridge, I wouldn't care. If someone ran over my dog, I would cry a lot (to the point where I tear up just thinking about it). But I love them both...so why the different reactions.

Okay, so one is a box of cookies and the other is a living being...I get it. Lets try a different one.

I love my friends, and I love my partner. I would hurt a lot if I lost any of them. What is the difference between the two... The difference between "loving" someone and being "in love" with them? I know there is one, I feel it.

This one is harder for me, most of my partners started out as friends first, then became something more. Where as with the people who are my friends, something stopped before we got to the point of partners. It was different for each of them, some weren't attracted to me (hard to believe, but true ;-)), some flat out said they just want to be friends from the start. So there is a line, but what's the line?

Is it lust? Physical attraction? If that's the case, then "romantic love" can only be temporary because our physical beings change so much over our life times. (So do our mental and emotional beings, but for most people it is far less obvious than the physical changes.) Also, what happens if you can't be with your partner for whatever reason...does that mean you love them less because you can't see them or touch them. It hasn't for me.

There are so many different types of love and ways to express them, that I really don't know what someone means when they say "I Love You". That worries me. What if I think they mean one thing, but they really mean something else, or I know what they mean, but they think I mean something else. And how do you ask questions about how they love you without sounding like an ass?

I've been talking to people about this, and I don't seem to be coming any closer to an answer. But at least its out of my head now...maybe someone has some thoughts that will help me.

UPDATE:
An associate had this to say about love...I think there is something to it.

"I can not tell you the true meaning of love. No one can. You will only find out when you experience it.
Love can be anything; we love our family, friends, and even strangers who steal our hearts, enters our minds, and fulfill our souls. When we truly love someone, that person becomes the fire in our life. Your 'soul mate' completes you in ways no one else can. You find them to be the most beautiful, funny, talented, most perfect person in the world. You feel incomplete without this person. You fall a sleep thinking about this person and wake up thinking about this person.
Being in love is extremely rare and so is true love. It should be treasured in most safest places. Once you get a hold of it don't ever let it go because if you do, it'll take your happiness with it. When your in love and when you love someone you are your most truest, purest being with them. They become your world and you become theirs. Again, no one can describe this out-of-this-world feeling. You know it when it happens.
You'll come up with your own definition. My definition of love is completion. Your life just begins when you fall in love or that is what it feels like anyway. There is excitement when there is love... even if it brings pain sometimes, you still miss it and its the best feeling in the world.
When you are in love, you would 'die' for the person you love. Why? Because you feel like that person is part of you, and completes you. :)"

I believe I have found that.

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